Big Bear Lake

One year ago Dave quit smoking. Having been a heavy smoker for 10 years I never thought I would see the day when I no longer had to wait in the car or in front of the restaurant while Dave took a quick smoke break. Saying that I am so VERY proud of him doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of how I feel. To celebrate I surprised Dave with a mini-vacation to do one of his very favorite activities: playing in the snow.

This was our first time going to the Southern California snow. Lake Tahoe and Central Sierras are our usual locations for snow escapades. On the way up we hit gnarly traffic. It took us one hour to go ten miles up the mountain. Dave wasn't happy but luckily we had Sirius to keep us entertained.


We finally arrived in Big Bear and the first thing we did was hit up a local brewery and drink beer. We did a lot of beer drinking that weekend (hence the weight gain) but with the ski lifts packed, relaxing in the resort pub while watching the playoff game was the perfect activity.

After drinking beer, we checked into our hotel. Our room overlooked Big Bear Lake and was less then 50 feet from the shore.


This was our view. I can't think of a better image to wake up to each morning.


Second best part of our hotel was that it was stumbling distance to The Village. It was quite nice to never have to drive to eat, drink, or play.


The snow lifts were still packed on Sunday so Dave and I decided to do a little hiking. Dave got us lost quite a bit and had to consult the map to find our way back on the trail.


Luckily, I am an expert navigator and was able to find the trail again.


Since everyone else was on the lifts, we were pretty much the only ones in the forest. I kept trying to convince Dave to write his name in the snow with pee but evidently Dave is much more mature then I and prefers to use his finger.


The view was gorgeous and I really didn't mind getting lost.


The most important thing is that I was spending time with the love of my life and really life doesn't get any better then that.


I am one lucky girl.

Clothes, Woes, Boys, and Toys

Weight Loss
When Dave and I first began our healthier lifestyle resolution we elevated the challenge by adding weekly goals and rewards/punishments. Going in to this I though "no problem!" since I am the Queen of Weight Loss and Dave is Mr Never Touched a Gym in His Life as well as the Baron of Taco Bell. Dave has always been athletically built and good at sports but beyond that has never had to try to stay fit therefore I thought I had an advantage to this whole challenge. I was born from the womb short and round and I've had to battle my figure my whole life.

Well, I greatly underestimated the competitive nature of my spouse. Had I known that all I had to do was issue a challenge I would have done this much sooner in order to motivate Dave to work out daily. Not only has he joined my gym and gone daily for 45 minutes but he has also completely revamped his eating habits (gone is fast food) as well as given up soda! This is huge coming from the man who used to drink 5-6 cans of coca cola a day. As of Week 1 Dave had lost 7 pounds and I had lost 3. Week 2 was tampered when we took a mini-vacation to a local snow resort and I re-gained the 3 from week 1 plus one I had lost in week 2 (total of 4 pounds). Dave regained 2 pounds. I'm really trying to make this healthy lifestyle something that I can do everyday for the rest of my life and evidently the vacation eating part of my lifestyle needs some tweaking.

Dreams of Our Fathers
Sunday night I had numerous dreams about boys I had dated in the past. Last night I dreamt of several scary wars in which I was forced to do battle. The boy dreams I enjoyed mostly because they involved lots of necking and heavy petting. The war dreams not so much. In one dream a tank was firing rapid succession at me and the ammo was oranges. It is citrus season here in Cali and obviously I have eaten one too many oranges.

Working Girl
I'm still insanely busy and working 12 hour days plus weekends. Luckily Dave is gone for work this week which allows me to work late into the night without feeling guilty. Now that it has been 3 months since the fires I am starting to get real tired of this schedule. Taking this past Monday off for our mini-vacay was refreshing but I can't keep doing this same schedule. Starting next week I am going to focus more on me and work only 9 hour days plus Saturdays. Dave is super motivated to do the gym thing and I'm going to make time to go to the gym with him as soon as my day has ended (4pm).

In other news, a National news crew is coming out next week to film our fire recovery work. I really would have liked to be much thinner but am trying not to stress over it too much. What am I saying? I am stressing over it big time! (to further clarify I am stressing over my weight not the national news part).

Shiny Toys
I got the new Sirius Stiletto 2 last week and I LOVE it. I'm already a big fan of Sirius but now I can take my Sirius with my when I go to the gym or out hiking! It's super small (about the size of a video IPOD) and light weight too. Now I am just waiting for the arm strap that I ordered to come so that I can stop treating it like a delicate flower.

Suddenly a Tennassee Titans Fan

Note to Self: When attending a NFL football playoff game, it might help if you are actually a fan of the home team. Otherwise you will spend a majority of the game fuming at the drunken douche bagginess of the home team fans. It didn't help that 95% of the fans in attendance were Chargers fans and only 5% of the rest were Titans fans. This meant that the drunken (and winning) Chargers fans felt it was their duty to yell insensitive slurs at the cowering Titans fans who were just trying to enjoy the game. It was worse then a Raiders versus Chargers game (at least then even when the game is played in San Diego a majority of the fans are wearing black and besides no one dares mess with the Raider Nation). Dave and I are neither Chargers not Titans fans but we had free tickets in the club level which meant great seats under cover from the rain and free food and booze. I would go again for the chance to watch a playoff game but after experiencing 3 hours of drunk asswhats I almost declared that alcohol and tailgating should be banned at games (this coming from me who is a huge fan of the beer in all situations and lovingly remembers tailgating from many Fresno State football games). Yet, you too would have immediately proclaimed that all games should be alcohol free after watching drunk idiots stumbling around trying to pick fights (unless you were a drunken idiot picking fights then you would have thought it to be a great time for all). Astonishingly enough we were in the club level where seats were $300-400 each and those in the cheaper seats on field level and in the higher decks encountered even more douche bagery and crowd fighting.

In more uplifting news, I've lost 45 pounds on three different occasions only to regain most of the weight back within one year. The latest time I lost the weight was for my wedding and already 25 pounds of that has crept back up on me. I am realizing that I am good at the losing but not so good at the keeping off. In the past I will practically starve myself for 6 months, drop tons of weight, and then become tired of the restrictions and go hog wild in the opposite direction. I really need to find a sensible eating plan that I can easily adopt as part of my everyday lifestyle so that I don't have to keep yo-yo'ing. Easier said then done. At the football game I was rather proud of myself, usually I will consume a bratwurst, garlic fries and lotsa beer (remember free beer in club level). This time I ordered a veggie burger and diet coke and I even held myself back when they brought out the mojitos (I will write a sonnet of my love for mojitos one day). One of my biggest problems in the past is that I splurge on special occasions and soon everyday becomes a special occasion for one reason or another. Lunch out with coworkers? Splurge! Hard day at work? Spurge! Finally Friday? Splurge! After a lot of thinking I have decided that the only days that count as splurge worthy are my birthday, fancy dinners paid by Dave's work, and holiday parties.

Other news, I am trying to convince Dave to let us extend our Lake Las Vegas vacation to encompass a night's stay at the Venetian since evidently 4 nights at the Ritz Carlton is not enough for me. I am having a hard time justifying my cause.

New Year, New Healthy Me

I'm a big fan of New Year's resolutions. No one is perfect so why not begin the new year with the goal of becoming a better person in one or two different ways. This year my goal is to become a healthier person. As I've said, since the fires my daily diet has consisted of whatever easy food I can grab and stuff in my mouth and my daily exercise has gone by the wayside. My resolution is to get back in the habit of exercising (5am!), eating healthy, taking a daily multi-vitamin (prenatal vitamins make my hair so shiny), brushing my teeth before bed (I'm not so good on this), and moisturizing every bit of my body after taking a shower (no wrinkles yet and I'd like to keep it that way).

To motivate myself even further, Dave and I have a small bet to see who can lose the most weight in ten weeks. Since Dave quit smoking a year ago, he has gained 20 pounds and has lacked the motivation to begin exercising. I've also gained weight since our wedding (10 pounds during our Honeymoon and then 15 pounds since the fires). I would really like to get back to my wedding weight before I continue to gain even more and things get out of control. In 10 weeks we plan on going to Lake Las Vegas and if I win Dave will pay for a day at the spa. I love messages and facials more then everything but sex and sushi so I am VERY excited to win.

I plan on blogging my progress once a week to keep myself motivated and accountable. Today was Day 1 of the challenge and I became winded after jogging for 40 minutes around the country club golf course. I am starving and sweaty and already realizing that getting back in shape is going to be a much bigger challenge then I had bargained.

A healthier looking me at our rehearsel dinner.

Didn't want it didn't need it but we knew that we could see it ...

I expected to come home from the car show with a long list of cars that I wanted to buy TOMORROW unfortunately that wasn't so. The good news is that Dave and I both found one vehicle we loved (and it was the same vehicle!) but the bad news is that for now the purchase price is not in our budget. For the $48,000 Lexus 400h we would need to put a down payment of $15k in order for our monthly payments to be $550 per month. With our income this is easily do-able but we're about to begin a kitchen remodel and the kitchen is more important then the SUV. *whine* Why can't I have both the new kitchen the 400h AND the Lexus IS250? Yes, I am a spoiled brat and yes the fact that I will have to wait to buy the 400h makes me extremely pouty and yes you can feel free to hate me for my pissy princess thoughts.

In slightly less shallow thoughts, when we bought this house 8 months ago we were convinced that we would be eating budget meals for the rest of our lives while we stretched our budget to afford a $450,000 house. Never did we think that in less then a year we'd be able to afford a contractor to remodel the kitchen but also be able to contemplate buying a new car soon after. It's amazing how things just have a way of working themselves out.

The Lexus IS250 which I love even more then the 400h but unfortunately is not as practical

Greed is the New "It" Sin

I want a new purse. I have a really cute deep red purse that I have been using that is somewhat small but super adorable. I really want a Coach purse in brown or deep red but I know that I will tire of it much too soon.

I want a new car. I am loving the Lexus Hybrid 400h SUV but not liking the $48,000 price tag. I am also loving the Range Rover but not loving the fact that it only comes in gas engine. Right now Dave and I are sharing one vehicle (my 2006 ford focus) which is fine since he works from home most days and I only work 5 miles from home. I'm just so bored with the safe blah-blah focus and want something much more exciting that also has navigation and Sirius satellite radio built in (ooo! also leather seats). We have a portable Garmin Nuvi as well as a handheld Sirius radio but trying to juggle both of them for car trips is frustrating. We are going to the auto show on Friday so expect me to come back with a long list of DINK cars that I have drooled over.

I want to go on a vacation but really don't have a specific location that I would like to visit. We are going on a mini-holiday to a mountain lodge resort to play in the snow in mid-January as well as a longer vacation to Lake Las Vegas in March. I just want to go someplace right this second (and never come back).

I really want to lose weight. Since late October when the fires happened, I have lived on a steady diet of ho-hos and late night McDonalds combined with root beer and zero exercise. Needless to say I have gained 15 pounds as well as become flabby. I hate flab. Now that things have slowed down (or seem like the will be slowing in the next few weeks) I need to get back in the grove of eating healthy and exercising daily. I'm actually looking forward to not feeling so yucky and unhealthy. Now talk to me in 2 months when I complain about not being able to eat the cake in the break room ...

Ho, Ho, Ho!

Good News: I am finally in the Christmas spirit and ready to decorate my house!
Bad News: The holidays are over.

Good News: I braved the crowds and did some after Christmas bargain shopping.
Bad News: I spent tons of money.

Good News: I have so many cute things to use as Christmas decorations.
Bad News: I have to store them in our attic until next year.

Good News: Christmas went well and we had a nice time.
Bad News: Now I have to go back to work. I am not in the mood to work.

The End.

He Makes Me Laugh

Scene - He is preparing dinner and I have just arrived home after a long day at work.
Him: How about angel hair pasta with mushroom spaghetti sauce?
Me: Ummm ... no.
Him: Por que?
Me: I just don't feel like mushroom spaghetti sauce. Is there any garlic spaghetti sauce?
Him: pero tu quires mushrooms.
Me: ehhh ...
Him: No comprende.
Me: No necessita comprende. Idiota!
Him: I give up.
Me: Wait! Did you just go from English to Spanish to spanglish and I didn't even notice until I answered you back in Spanish.
Him: I guess.
Me: Only in San Diego County (aka Northern Mexico) would it be so common place to hear Spanish everywhere you go and begin incorporating it into your everyday language.
Him: haha!
________________________________________________________________________

Scene - We have just arrived back at our hotel room after attending his work holiday party. I am very drunk and we are in the middle of doing what married couples do.

Us: kiss, kiss, smooch, smooch ...
Him: Look there are crumbs in the bed!
Me: ummm ... yeah, crumbs.
Him: *stops doing what he was doing and begins brushing the crumbs off the bed*
Me: Holy Hell! What are you doing?
Him: Brushing crumbs off the bed.
Me: I think not! Get your head back in the game and Man Up!
Him: *blank stare*

12 Days of Christmas

I was reading this blog and this blog which did a 12 things about Christmas meme and it made me think how differently the holidays are celebrated by each family. Since I'm not into tagging and I don't care to wait until I am tagged, I thought I would do my own 12 things about Christmas.

1. I hate gaudy xmas decorations! The type I am talking about is the snowman snow globe, tacky multi-colored lights, and other garish cartoon like decorations. I much prefer something like the picture above; classy, simple, and yet still festive.

2. This year I haven't even decorated a single bit for the holidays. No tree, no stockings, no outside lights. I've just been way too busy the past few months and to be honest we don't have little ones nor do we have family in the area. What point is there in decorating when no one besides ourselves will see it?

3. Growing up we always opened presents on xmas eve. We'd travel to my Grandparent's house, visit with extended family, eat tamales, then open presents after everyone but immediate family had left. Xmas day was spent being lazy and eating breakfast at Denny's.

4. I really hate that the holidays have become an over commercialized affair. I would much prefer to go sans presents (except for the kiddos) but this idea is never appreciated by our families. I would really like to do some type of charity work as a family since in my eyes this is what xmas should be about. At the very most I would do a secret santa exchange but even this idea is never liked by anyone but me.

5. I REALLY hate opening presents in front of others. For starters I think it sucks to have to pretend to love your gifts when the gift giver is staring at you from across the room. But I also think it sucks to have to sit there for a long period of time while I watch each and every family member "ooh" and "aah" while they open their gifts.

6. I never send holiday cards and I never will!

7. I love holiday parties. I look forward to them for days. I love dressing up, seeing friends, drinking, eating good food (usually), and the festive spirit.

8. Even though it may sound like it, I'm really not a Grinch. Each year I look forward to the holidays but I just sometimes think that the reason for the season has been forgotten.

9. Dave and I alternate where we spend the holidays. One year we do Thanksgiving with my family and xmas with his. The next is t-day with his family and xmas with mine.

10. Dave and are I doing stockings this year as our presents to each other. I do love waking up on xmas day and digging through a stocking full of goodies. I always think the little presents are the best (mmmm ... chocolate candies!).

11. My perfect holiday would be xmas eve spent at a holiday party (at my house or at a relatives) during which we eat, drink, and catch up. Everyone would then exchange presents and take them home to be opened later that night or the next morning. On xmas day the hubby and I would wake up in our own home. We would cook a good homemade breakfast and then open our stockings and spend the rest of the day lounging around the house. Xmas dinner would be spent with immediate family.

12. Next Saturday Dave and I are going to my grandparent's house to learn how to make tamales. I am so excited since tamale making is something you can't learn at your local culinary school. It's a weird association but more then anything, tamales remind me of the holidays.

How do you spend your holidays?

Snippets of Vacations Past

1) Glamis, December 2001 - We've driven for over 10 hours and have finally arrived at our destination. We're dirty and extremely tired but at the moment all we can think of is how excited we are to finally be here. We jump out of the truck and immediately I am blinded by the bright sun, white sand, and blue sky. It is December but in the middle of the desert it feels more like July. That night the opportunity arises for us to sleep together in the same bed. I will attempt to touch his penis but he will shy away each time. Two years later he comes out as gay.


2) Las Vegas, February 1990 - I am ten years old and we have just arrived at our hotel. While my Mom checks in I stay in the lobby and stare at the carpet. At that moment the gaudy, brightly colored designs look like the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I vow to never forget the carpet and focus all my attention on remembering each feathery loop.


3) Vancouver BC, December 2002 - We are walking through downtown after visiting a local wine bar in search of more ice wine. Between giggles we talk about our futures and what we want our life to be like someday. A few girls express their wish to live in the country on a farm. I look up at the high rises and realize with a sudden clarity that a thriving city is where I need to be. Our conversation turns and we begin talking about what to eat for lunch and someone suggests sushi. Three of us have never had raw seafood and politely refuse. A few years later on one of the rare occasions when we are all together we devour sushi.

That's what I'm waiting for

I'm really not gonna shut up about Modest Mouse.

Someone posted a clip from last night's show. This was actually one of their more sedate songs that they played and while it was good I didn't love, LOVE it but it still shows their awesome rock starness.


Even better, they recently released a video for their kick ass song Little Motel. Watch this video from start to end and be prepared to cry.

It rained and its over a shooting star
Landed directly on our broke down little car
We fold and we had made a wish
That we would be missed
If one another just did not exist

Right wing, left wing, chicken wing

You know that feeling you get after you've just had a fantastically fun time? A bit of the ho-hum blues when you realize that the moment you just had will.never.happen.again. *sigh* Last night Dave and I went to the Modest Mouse concert. Easily it was the 2nd best concert that I have ever attended (1st is the Dave & Friends concert at Oakland Coliseum which was a once in a lifetime opportunity where I was just the right amount of inebriated and had 8th row seats).

I was hesitant about going to the concert as it was held at an open seating concert hall and Modest Mouse is notorious for being too drunk to perform which is why I've never seen MM in the past even though I have loved their music since 2003. Dave and I got there 30 minutes before the opening act because I wanted a good spot and Matt Costa was the opener (Me + Matt Costa = Forever). As soon as I found out that Matt Costa was the opener I should have realized that the stars were aligned and this concert was made especially for me. For those of you who are unfamiliar, Matt Costa is more like Jack Johnson (he makes me want to surf, smoke some up, then eat a breakfast burrito) while MM is just so spastic (they make me want to take a long drive while singing at the top of my lungs). Two great styles (in my book) but not exactly two types of bands that you expect to support each other.

Matt Costa was fantastic. His voice was pure loveliness and the crowd was very polite even though Matt is still relatively unknown and I think I was the only one in the crowd who could actually sing along to his songs. MM began to perform after an obscenely long set change during which 2 drum kits and a stand up bass were brought out. For once Isaac Brock (the lead singer) wasn't doped out of his mind and could actually sing the songs well and with understandable lyrics. The two drummers (who were beating their little hearts out) combined with the guitar god Johnny Marr and a on-top-of-his game Brock made for a spectacular concert. The set list was just the right combo of classics from their early days combined with songs off their new album. They jammed out and funked up some of their songs but didn't spend half the concert going off on some musical tangent *cough* DMB *cough*. It was just the perfect type of concert where the music infuses your soul and makes you dance and sing without consciously realizing what you are doing. *sigh* All in all it was a perfect evening and I am so sad that no recording was made of the concert because I would love listen to it and over and over while reliving the concert.

If you haven't done so already: fall in love with Modest Mouse.

Pain (Invaded)

When Dave first graduated college he worked for Makita Tools in their marketing division and as a result he became the proud owner of almost all the top of the line tools Makita has to offer. This is great now that we are first time home owners and need to do some type of home improvement on a regular basis.

We're getting ready to remodel our kitchen so this weekend I've been playing around on Ikea's on-line planner tool trying to lay out the kitchen cabinets. I was stomping around in the garage trying to find a tape measure and getting progressively pissy that no tape measures were to be found when I threw open one of the garage cabinets and discovered that it was empty. Bare. The cabinet we use to store all the Makita tools. Barren. We have lots of bright teal Makita tools and for all of them to be missing from the cabinet is a bit jaw dropping to see. I keep our garage very clean so I took a quick spin around the garage to make sure they weren't sitting on top of the washing machine. Nope. Missing.

Dave and I searched the house and garage again and sure enough they were no where to be found which means that someone came into our garage and burglarized us most likely when we were home. This thought has been so unsettling to me. Not only because we live in a private country club and you just assume that you are safe but also to think that someone might have invaded our personal property (regardless if we were home at the time). Even scarier is the thought that since only our Makita tools were taken that likely someone "cased" our home and had watched us for awhile to determine where the good stuff was. Creepy.

I've been so busy at work so we haven't done any home improvement projects in some time so Dave and I were trying to rack our brains to determine when the tools might have been stolen. Luckily, I took pics of the entire house during the fire (in case it burned down) and in those pictures I found many of the garage and the tools. That means that the person who stole from us targeted us within the last 6 weeks. Scary.

Luckily, we have a home alarm and plan on using it a lot more in the future. Still I find myself in a very sad mood to think that there are people out there who invade others and take things that aren't theirs. Errr ....

Vacation

I saw this picture on dooce.com and it immediately made me want to run away to someplace cold and curl up near a fireplace. The high here today is 77 and it's sunny. I'm so ready for winter-like weather and a vacation.

PS - Tammy, don't suggest Iowa!

Pump You Up

Sorry I've been MIA but after working five straight weeks of 70 hours plus, my body is finally starting to feel the stress and break down. It all started when Dave made me leave work the Wednesday before Thanksgiving so that we could fly up to my in laws house for the holiday. We weren't due to return home until the following Saturday (4 days later) and the thought of being away from work all those days was STRESSing me the f'ck out. Plus, Dave's mom tends to stress me out naturally so that didn't help my anxiety level much.

Thanksgiving evening I began itching all over. I blamed the dog and its fleas but apparently I was the only one feeling the bugs. By Saturday the itching had turned into ugly red welts all over my chest, arms, legs, back, and stomach. On Tuesday I went to the doctor and learned that I am having an allergic reaction to something. He put me on steroids which helped but I'm still having a hard time breathing because of the allergic reaction. I go next Monday for testing to see what the offending allergen might be. Obviously it is something that I am encountering in my everyday life.

Then last Thursday (the night before a very important deadline) I woke up at 11pm yaking my brains out. This lasted every 30 minutes all night until 5am. By dawn I could barely walk because I was so weak and was shivering cold. It's not even hyperbole to say that I truly wanted to die at that moment from being so miserable. Showing my true commitment to work, I slept from 6am to noon and then went into work to finish my project. I think I deserve the #1 Federal Employee Award (or maybe just the #1 Crazy Award).

OK. This post isn't even funny or entertaining but unfortunately I couldn't think of a way to make hives and puke interesting. Only 3 more weeks of this heavy workload and then I am taking one long arse week of vacation during which I plan on doing nothing but sitting on the couch and watching TV. The countdown begins ...

Funny Life

Isn't it funny that 3 weeks ago I was ready to hang my hubby by his toenails. As we all know relationships have their hills and valleys and at that time I was in a valley. Not anything that he did yet I certainly loved my husband but wasn't sure that week that I liked him. In all honestly it prolly had more to do with me and my state of mind versus him and his habits. Anyways, 3 weeks ago I could of easily ran away from that man and not looked back. This week he is gone on a business trip and I am missing him like crazy. Happy Thanksgiving. I am very thankful to have such an awesome husband.

Breaking Point

On Friday I gave four media interviews. Two of them were over the phone interviews for newspapers, one was for the local ABC affiliate, and the other was an in person interview for a regional news radio program. I sucked in all of them.

Previous to Friday, my media resume had consisted of two different experiences. In the first I shot a 15 minute fluff piece for a special that aired on PBS. It took a whole day to shoot the piece during which I was ordered to walk here, walk back, pretend to explain something to someone else, smile, play dead, etc. Most of the piece was going to be pre-written voice over work so the amount of questions that I had to spontaneously answer was minimal. Plus I had 2 public affairs specialists on-site watching my every move on camera, therefore I never felt nervous since I knew if I fumbled my words they would both pop up and feed me lines.

In the other previous experience I was emailed a list of questions a week before hand so that I could formulate my response. The whole time I was being interviewed I pretty much read my response verbatim and then afterwards handed over my written answers so that everything could be transcribed correctly.

Lesson Learned: I do well when someone holds my hand.

During the phone interviews I was given no advance warning. So in effect they went something like this:
Me: *drawing a map, rocking out to Coldplay, probably thinking about what I will eat for lunch*
Phone: Ring, Ring!
Me: What up? (Just kidding! I answer the phone like an adult)
Phone: Hi, My name is Debbie Downer from Serious Newspaper and I have a few questions for you.
Me: *fumble response, drool, bang head against computer*

The TV interview was worse since my State Head Honcho left it up to me to present for 10 minutes in front of a packed press conference during which everyone else who presented was the head of their federal or state agency. Actually, I am thankful for him giving me the opportunity to present since it shows that he trusts and respects me plus he was by my side the entire time so it's not like he fed me to the wolves. Point being: it was a massive press conference, lots of tv cameras and reporters, and angry people who have lost everything in the fires. As soon as everything ended I was happy as a clam since I had been nervous to the point of throwing up but as soon as I got up to the podium I was overcome by the ghost of George Washington and magically became this poised speaker. Bottom line was I rocked.

Then a news personality sweeps me to the side as I'm limping off the stage and drags me to a corner so that they can get a one-on-one interview. Have you ever had a giant camera stuck in your face while someone asks you difficult questions? Not easy. I ended up stumbling through the entire interview while at the same time shadily shifting my eyes back-and-forth toward the camera man since he was standing mere inches from my face. Thanks dude. The radio interviewer dragged me away as soon as the TV person had chewed me up and spit me out. At that point I didn't have much left in me.

I think I'm gonna need media training since my agency has pledged a bazillion jillion dollars towards fire recovery work on private lands and I have a feeling that there will be more interviews in my future. Today has already been nasty crazy and I am just about ready to hide under my desk and cry until everyone goes away and leaves me alone.

I Needed a Reason

#2 Reason for Having a Husband: When you have a nightmare at 2am about an out of control dump truck that is careening through your neighborhood, you can awake startled and have someone hold you tight while you calm down and go back to sleep. Best. Feeling. Ever. (#1 reason is sex on demand. Duh!)

And on a totally unrelated topic: everyone seems to be going shoe crazy with NaPoBloMo. My boots today which I bought this weekend at Macy's which was having a rocking shoe sale.

He is Playing SoCom, I am Listening to Hum

Surprise, surprise. I decided to honor part of the 3 day weekend and only go to work one of those days. The other days I've been running around trying to catch up on my personal life. All the fun stuff like bills, grocery shopping, dropping off dry cleaning, and clothes shopping. Also, downloading my camera which I haven't done in far too long. Here is a picture catch up:

A few months ago, I went to Oregon to visit my best friend. Oregon was far more beautiful then I imagined it would be as well as far more rural. I miss her so much ;-(

About a month ago we went to the San Diego Chargers vs Oakland Raiders football game. Good game except the part where the Raiders f'ed up and lost yet another game. PS - Dear Chargers, when playing another Cali team please stop playing this song every time you score a TD. In that case it doesn't make sense!

Dave's office that we recently (2-3 months ago) renovated by laying ikea tundra laminate flooring. Cheap and relatively easy. Now if only I could find pictures to hang that Dave actually liked. The boy is PICKY when it comes to just above everything. Oh lucky me.

The view from our house on the first day of the fires (Monday). The nasty red color and smoke lasted for days.

Goodnight!

PS. Doing it old school: Hum

Destruction

Various pics that I have taken over the last week. I was out with a tour of congressional representatives when a fire began 300 yards away from where we stood. Luckily, a helicopter spotted the fire immediately and began dropping water buckets on the hot spot. We were so close to the fire that the helicopter was dropping water on us as it was flying overhead.

Man Candy Music

I'm busier then a worker bee. Going 100mph without time to stop and breath but I love it. Doing a lotta driving and listening to Snow Patrol. Still love them. You should too.

On an unrelated note, fires are still burning here but are 100% contained (contained just means that there is a fire line around the perimeter of the fire, not that the fire is out). Anyways, lots of firefighters running around town and sleeping in local hotels. Seems like everyday I run into one and they all seem to have the same basic qualities: smoldering good looks, hard body, exudes sexiness. Not sure what is about them but I'm starting to think it's a requirement for firefighters to be hott. Luckily, I worked for the Forest Service while in college and personally came to realize that most firefighters are cocky asses. Cute but pricks. Oh well, I still love the eye candy.

Trick

I didn't get home tonight until 8:45pm and unfortunately missed all the trick or treaters. As I was driving home from a meeting at 6:30pm and going over all the things I would need to do when I got back to the office, I became super disappointed because Halloween is one of my favorite holidays ever and we bought tons of GOOD candy for the kids (big snickers bars and pb cups, we have no kids and tons of disposable income). So I'm driving home and feeling sad that another 12 hour work day would ruin something I've been looking forward to for the past month but then as I entered the County line I looked to my left and right and saw the hills and mountains that used to be covered in lush landscape but has now been burnt to a blackened moonscape. It made me realize that there are those out there who wont have a home to trick or treat from. Thousands who will walk down a street where one home exists and another doesn't as they knock door to door. Many have lost their homes, many have lost their land, and I feel so proud to be part of an agency that is helping them restore what was taken from them. It makes these late nights and 7/11 meals so worth it as I realize that what I am doing is making a difference. For so long I've babbled on about how much I miss San Francisco. Yet, for the first time as I drove through the moonscape I felt an overwhelming sense of love for this County. For the first time San Diego felt like home.

Photo Credit: San Diego Union-Tribune

Happy Halloween

My arse is being kicked by these 12 hour days. My typical day:

5:30 - Wake up and go to the gym

6:30 - Take a shower and get ready for work

7:30 - Get to the office

8:00 - Run out the door since I am late to my first meeting. Scarf down a boiled egg and string cheese while trying to weave in and out of traffic.

8:30 to Noon - Meetings, meetings, politicking, driving, tours, blah, blah, etc.

Noon - Realize that I have another meeting or appointment across town which I am already late for. Stop at gas station and while filling up on gas, grab a diet coke and something that I can eat quickly. Yesterday was Oreo Cakesters and while very yummy not exactly a nutritious source of energy. I'm having a really hard time with lunch these past few days. Usually I eat salads or lean cuisines. Unfortunately, I can't eat a salad in the car and I'm no where near a microwave to heat up a frozen meal.

12:30 to 6:00 - Meetings, tours, strategizing sessions, blah, blah, etc.

6:00 to 8:00 - Get back to the office and return phone calls, answer emails, make maps.

8:15 - Drive home and eat dinner.

8:45 - Watch one hour of tv and converse with Hubby.

9:45 - Get ready for bed.

10:00 - Out cold.

My Perfect Saturday

In honor of the fact that I will be working 12 hour days and many weekends from now until December (I already have to attend a community meeting this Sunday!). I am spending this Saturday doing everything that makes a day perfect for me.

7:30 - Wake up naturally feeling well rested and refreshed.

7:30 - 9:30 - Go to living room, brew a huge pot of hot green tea, curl up in a blanket on the couch and read a good book while listening to some new music. Current read: The Count of Monte Cristo. Current Music: Snow Patrol

9:45 - Get my arse handed to me at pilates class.

11:00 - Drive my sweaty booty to Panera for a french toast or pink ribbon bagel with honey walnut spread. Mmmmm ... Yum. The only reason I endure the weekly 60 minutes of hell otherwise known as pilates.

Noon - Go home and take a steaming hot shower.

12:45 - Lay in bed while watching a sappy chick flick.

2:30 - 3:30 - Nap (I love me a good weekend nap)

5:00 - Meet good friends downtown for a good bottle of wine and some sushi!!!

11:00 - Collapse in bed, drunk and happy

What is your perfect Saturday?

Day 4

My how quickly life returns to normal-ish. 36 hours ago Dave and I left the house to drive around the corner and grab a frozen yogurt treat. The entire trip lasted 20 minutes and yet the whole time I was riddled with anxiety about BOTH of us leaving the house at the same time and not being able to answer the reverse 911 call. I couldn't even relax enough to enjoy my fro-yo and had to keep fighting the urge to sniff the air every 5 minutes. Since then the winds have been calm and the fires have reversed direction. Last night Dave and I even went to Fry's and out to eat! It felt like a whole new world after being stuck in a house together for the last 72 hours. Today I'm back at work and just like I predicted my feet have hit the ground running. My day is filled with an 8am briefing, 3pm briefing, recon planning, politicking for local government sponsors, staffing needs diagrams, and lots of other stuff that only makes sense if you've just been ravaged by a natural disaster. Thanks to everyone who sent emails. Any social interaction I received was much appreciated after staring at the news so much. Posting will be light and will mostly consist of pictures that I take while doing the reconnaissance tours of the burned and damaged lands. Ciao.

Photo Credit: San Diego Union-Tribune

Update Day 3

7:55am - Life is trying to return to normal. A prime time show was actually shown on tv last night; news has re-introduced commercials; even a radio station played an actual song instead of reporting non-stop about the fires. As much as I would like this nightmare to end, I really think the media is forcing us back to normal even though we shouldn't be. While winds were calm last night, as you can see from the pic above, more fires began last night and the existing fires are still 0% contained. At this point my house and much of the County is still within danger. Heck half the County is still colored purple and under mandatory evac. I thought about getting away and going to the office this morning but then I quickly realized that beyond organizing my email, sitting in the office would be worthless. I can't go into the field since most of the roads are closed and half my landowner's properties have burned. All my meetings for the week have been canceled. And four of my ten staff is in other parts of SoCal and still evacuated from their homes.

On a lighter note: Have you all heard about the outstanding job that is being done at Qualcomm stadium? One of Dave's coworkers has been evacuated to the stadium since Monday afternoon and it seems to really be like a big tailgate party.

Update Day 2 (as of 10:45pm)

7:50 am - Well it was nice to pretend to sleep last night. The constant smell of burnt campfire and the bright orange color of the sky (even though it was 2am) make it hard to relax enough to stay asleep. We found out that we are in the evac zone but so far haven't received the 911 call. For now we will stay put since I'd rather be as comfortable in my home for as long as possible. Several sources of water and electricity were damaged last night. They are asking us to conserve water, energy, stay off the roads, and not use our cell phones. Best estimates are that 300,000 acres have been burned and over 1,500 homes. I think those numbers are conservative. Things got much worse in the night. Almost the entire coast has been evacuated since they are sure that the fire wont stop until it reaches the ocean. We're being threatened by a new fire (Poomacha) that began last night. See this blog to see the path of the fire and the green dot that is very close to our house. I think we'll be evacuated by tonight ;-( I remember how I used to joke that I wish I had lived here during the 2003 fires since my agency did so much of the restoration work and I was constantly looking at sites that had been burned before I moved down here. Now I realize what an idiot I was. I wish I wasn't here today and I know others wish they weren't here in 2003.

9:05am - I just ran to the corner grocery store to pick up a few staples that would be needed if we evacuate. I expected to walk in and see aisles and aisles of empty grocery racks. I even expected the place to be a mad house. Our neighborhoods is one of the last to receive it's mandatory evac orders and it seems that everyone and their brothers have brought their personal effects laden cars and RVs to camp out on our streets and in friend's homes. What I didn't expect was to find the Starbucks counter the most crowded part of the store. I guess that people in times of emergency find Starbucks to be a source of comfort? I seriously didn't even attempt to walk past that portion of the store because the area was so crowded with people standing like sardines in a can.

11:50am - I feel like things have gotten better in the last hour. It's hard to tell. The news is on 24/7 with no commercial breaks but is having to devote itself to 4 major fires (in SD alone) therefore receiving specific info about our location is kinda hard. At this point many emergency info websites have gone down too from so much traffic. Making it worse the largest mountain in the city limits burned this morning taking with it major cell phone towers and TV/radio transmitters. We still have TV but it has sub par quality in both audio and visual. I took a shower earlier and I must admit that I've become somewhat addicted to showers knowing that if we need to go to a evac facility, hot showers will prolly not be included. Things are so much sweeter knowing you might not have them tomorrow.

3:15pm - Life has stopped for everyone in SD. No driving, no shopping, no going to work, no going to the movies. Just sit at home with your eyes glued to the TV and wait, wait, wait for the reverse 911 call. Sending emails to local friends asking "have you got your call yet?". Same email repeated several times through out the day. Occasionally stealing 2 minute phone calls to ask the question and receive limited social interaction. Cabin fever has set in. Two entire days at home and I feel no more relaxed then 4 intense days at the office. The Poomacha and the Witch Creek fires continue to threaten us. Over 1,800 firefighters battling a 23,000 acre and a 200,000 acre blaze. Over 1,250 homes burned and 510,000 residences evacuated (which pisses me off when nat'l news reports that as 510,000 people, noooo residences don't equal people, residences equal so many more, 2-4 people per residence!) All I can do is wait at this point knowing that as soon as the fire is controlled, my work days will become 14 hours long as I race to prevent the mudslides before the season's first rains.

7:40pm - This like a scary nightmare that I am ready to wake up from. One minute things are better, the wind has died down quite a bit, and firefighters are gaining control of the fires. The next we're placed under 2 different mandatory evac zones (one for the Poomacha fire and one for the Witch Creek fire) yet no reverse 911 call. So far our neighbors are staying put therefore we are too. Night is fast approaching and I am dreading sleep (or I should really say laying in bed while one sleeps and the other stares at the news). Night tends to be when the winds pick back up and the fires begin raging out of control. I'm almost attempted to go into town tomorrow and make a visit to my office. This sitting and wait, wait, waiting is killing me. We could go to an evac center (aka the local high school gym) but I know Dave and I would both be up half the night wondering if we made a good decision and whether our house was truly in danger.

10:45pm - Time to pretend to sleep. I've never dreaded night as much as I have these past few days.


Photos by nctimes.com

Update (as of 8:25pm)

Due to the nature of my job, Dave and I are staying until the last possible minute. I'm gonna keep blogging just because this whole situation is so unreal. The fire began in the mountains but because of strong Santa Ana winds, the fire quickly flew down the canyons and into the city boundaries. A HUGE part of the city has mandatory evacuation and the rest of the city (even along the coast) is being encouraged to be prepared to leave at any time. The fire is traveling so fast and the winds are so strong plus they still have 0% containment, therefore they don't know where the fire may hit next. Already there was a small fire on the hill directly across from our house but luckily a fire engine was stationed there so the fire was put out quickly (the hill offers a nice vantage point of my town). The sky is a dark brownish red and smells horribly. Power keeps going on and off and people have been encouraged not to go to work or use their cell phones.

There was a similar fire 4 years ago that almost reached the city limits. Today's fire (in my opinion) is so much worse. My federal agency pledged $120 million to the restoration of lands after the 2003 fire. Today most of those projects have been burned to the ground. $120 million. Gone. I'm so upset about that. It looks like as soon as the fire is contained, I'll be very busy trying to ensure that mud slides don't occur when the burned land receives rain (burned dirt + rain = mud + downhill slope = mudslide).

I'll keep updating if anything else interesting occurs. This whole situation is so horrible and scary but at the same time I hope I never forget how this feels.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/10/22/wildfire.ca/index.html

8:56am - I totally forgot to add that Dave was supposed to fly to Dallas for week long a business meeting. Fortunately/unfortunately the airport is closed due to the smoke and limited visibility. I'd be terrified if I was facing this alone.

10:38am - Our house is almost engulfed in a smokey haze. We still haven't received the reverse 911 call that means get out now. I was supposed to box all the important (sensitive) files in my office. Unfortunately I couldn't get to the office quick enough before the area was named off limits. So far 250,000 residences have been evacuated. 250,000 residences!!! If 4 people lived in every house that means that 1 million people have been evacuated. This is far from over.

11:15am - Within a 5 minute period the sky turned from brownish-red to milky white. I almost feel like we're in the eye of the hurricane. I have attended several basic fire ecology classes (because of my job) and never have I heard of a sudden change in the color of the smoke. Surprisingly, this milky white smoke is actually harder to see through versus the brown red (we can't even see the hill across the street). This fire started less then 24 hours ago and is far from being contained. I really wonder what the next 24 hours will bring us. We already knew that the main freeway south of us is closed, as well as the road east (duh! it's where the fire began), and earlier this morning we learned that the road west of us is closed too. About 5 minutes ago the news reported that the roads north of us are closed as well. That had been our plan before (drive north upon evacuation) so essentially we're confined to a box. I have no idea where we will go if the fire continues to proceed in our direction. Right now the fire is 8 miles away (according to our best estimates). The fire originally began 36 miles away. 28 miles in 24 hours. Wow.

1:30pm - Still no idea where we're going to go upon evac. News just posted a big map showing our area as being under mandatory evac. We've been waiting for the reverse 911 call but at this point we just might pack up and sit in the car. I know that emergency resources are all heavily taxed right now and I wouldn't be surprised if the reverse 911 system fails. Since my staff and I can't even reach the office (road closures) we've all been granted admin leave for the next few days (admin leave = paid vacation). Unfortunately, my day has been anything but relaxing. News has been on 24/7, preempting regular programing and not even stopping for commercials. This fire is so sporadic and volatile that I haven't even taken a shower for fear of missing something big being reported on the tv. Luckily we haven't lost power like the rest of the county (yet) so we're much more in the know then others.

4:02pm - All around us is burning. We've been lucky (so far) and have evaded mandatory evac but it is pretty scary that we seem to be this little unburned island in the middle of hell. I finally convinced Dave to pack up the car so that if the call did come we wouldn't be running around like chickens with our head cut off. See this google map and note that all the red dots are fire. Dave, in an emergency situation, tends to favor the "ignore and it will go away" mode of thinking. I remember after I crashed my ATV in Mexico, Dave kept saying "come on get up and let's get back on the ATV". Let me remind you that I was splayed out on my back in the middle of a ravine. Getting up and continuing to ride the ATV was not an option. Anyways, I finally convinced Dave to pack the car since if we do evacuate, we'll need to stay at a make-shift high school shelter. Many of the shelters have already ran out of cots and food. Dave and I needed to pack like we were camping. Items packed: pb&j sandwiches, blankets, sleeping bags, pillows, towels, nana's china, cat supplies, pictures, and computers. For some great pics check out this blog. He's been picture blogging the entire few days and lives really close to me so many of his pics are exactly what I've been looking at all day. PS - I randomly found that blog while searching for a map of evac zones. The news is being a bit unpredictable and one minute shows our area as being evacuated and the next shows us as being clear. Oye Vey.

8:25pm - Conditions are just as severe as they were this morning. Logically everyone knew this fire wouldn't go away in 24 hours but I never imagined we'd need to try and sleep with the constant threat of evacuation. Tv and internet have become our lifelines. Our neighborhood is still being displayed on the news as under mandatory evacuation but we haven't received a reverse 911 call yet. Dave and I would both rather not spend the night on the hard floor of a gym when we could be pretending to sleep in our own bed. I think it might surprise most people to know that we live in the middle of suburbia. This fire is racing like a machete across tract homes and shopping centers. They are saying that it is the worst fire to ever hit California. I don't doubt it. Last report was 145,000 acres and 0% containment. Yep, let me repeat that. 0% containment as in this fire is burning out of control and there is no one who can stop it. They say that there are 650 firefighters working on the blaze with no hope of reinforcements (for the foreseeable future). I have no idea how these poor guys are supposed to keep fighting after being up for 24 hours straight. I should prolly also clarify that I keep saying this fire when in fact I am referring to the Witch Creek Fire. There are 7 other major fires burning in our County all at the same time (for a total of 8). At least 8 is the conservative number. There are no planes being flown so officials are having a hard time detailing exactly how many fires are burning.

Armageddon

It's crazy here. Half of the San Diego County is on fire. We're being evacuated. I've never seen anything like this.

PS - This is an actual photo. Crazy!

We've Got Everything

Ever have one of those days when you just can't feed yourself enough food in order to stop your tummy from grumbling? Today is one of those days for me and surprisingly enough I'm super busy today and usually when I'm busy or preoccupied, I forget to eat. It'll be 7pm and I'll still be at work and all of a sudden I look at the clock and remember that it is an hour past my normal dinner time, I forgot to eat lunch and my 3pm snack. Oops! Time to eat. Today I'm super busy but am interrupted every 30 minutes by the rumble and tumble going on in my midsection. At this point I'll eat anything that I can get my hands on. Hello banana! Making this even more bewildering, it's not even cold or overcast today (I always seem to get hungrier on chilly days). According to weather.com our current conditions are 74 and sunny.

In other news, I went out into the field with the super cute landowner from my last post. Damn, he makes me drool. Let's just say that the meeting was awkward thanks to my inability to form coherent sentences or words around his Holy Hotness. I ended up stammering and making no sense for most of the visit which royally sucked because I was supposed to be giving him advice and recommendations. D'oh! The whole meeting got off on the wrong foot when I hopped out of my 4x4 and I couldn't find the words necessary to greet him. He walked up to me as I am planted at the door of my truck and looked at me weirdly (prolly cuz my mouth was agape and I was staring at him). I then said the first words I could think of "cold. I'm cold". Let me remind you that it was 70 and sunny when we met and we were both wearing t-shirts and jeans. He looks at me even more quizzically (which is a way hot look for him) and says "really. do you not have a heater in your truck?". It's a brand new truck so all I could think of in response was to stare into his eyes with my mouth still wide open. STUPID, STUPID, STUPID. Let's all be thankful that I'm out of the dating pool cuz that interaction right there tells you that I am not meant to ever exercise my flirting skills. Poor guy probably thinks I'm a ditz.

Hotcha Boys

Two things about life in San Diego:

1) Most people think that we are lucky enough to have a Mediterranean climate. This means that our summers are 85 and sunny and our winters are 75 and sunny. I don't kid. My next vacation wont be to someplace sunny and warm. Nope, I'll be headed to someplace foggy and cold because I am sick and tired of the same ol' weather day in and day out. Give me a little variety please!

2) Walk down a street in SD and you will be surrounded by good looking, fit people. I don't know why but it seems that this town has a much higher then average population of people that could be models. I'm very glad that I'm not single because I know I wouldn't have a chance against some of the leggy and thin women that I meet each day. Usually I interact with cute boys occasionally but lately I have a met a bevy of hotties through work. Four hotties I've met in the last 48 hours:


I was at SeaWorld today to view the yellowtail and seabass fishery. I was led by a cutie marine biology research associate who could have passed for a shaggy surfer haired Chris O'Donnell. Add some dickies and a pair of vans for a yum, yum effect.



In the afternoon I went to view a retaining wall demo. The two civil engineers on the project could have passed for Paul Walker and Ewan McGregor. Double YUM.


Tomorrow I have a field visit with a landowner who could pass for a slightly more masculine version of Enrique Iglesias. He is HOTT! Poor me will be stuck outside hiking with him for several hours. I may be married but just because I can't have the wine doesn't mean I can't enjoy the bouquet. Yum.

Guide to Loving Isaac Brock

I plan on going to the Modest Mouse concert in December and as a result I've re-found my love for Isaac Brock. Isaac Brock is the lead singer (and sex god, mmmmm tattoos) for the band Modest Mouse as well as his side project Ugly Casanova. Because I think that Brock's musical genius is often overlooked, I've made a little guide of Isacc Brock's best songs (in my opinion). Good music is yummy.

Note: Due to my laziness, I've abbreviated the band names and the CD titles. MM = Modest Mouse & UC = Ugly Casanova.

Float On - MM, Good News
Ocean Breathes Salty - MM, Good News
Little Motel - MM, We Were Dead (One of my very favs!!!)
Paper Thin Walls - MM, Baron Von Bullsh&t
The World At Large - MM, Good News
Hotcha Girls - UC, Sharpen Your Teeth
We've Got Everything - MM, We Were Dead
Bukowski - MM, Good News
Polar Opposites - MM, Lonesome Crowded West
Gravity Rides Everything - Moon & Antarctica
Dramamine - MM, Long Drive
Good Times Are Killing Me - MM, Baron Von Bullsh*t

Holy cow. I'll stop there even though I haven't included half the songs I would like to off of the Lonesome Crowded West, Moon & Antarctica, or from the Ugly Casanova CD. Hopefully you fall in love with them just as much as I have.

Good Music = Happy Soul

We all like music. I'm partial to the indie type and as we all know the indie nerds couldn't be happy just categorizing all indie music together. Nope they had to break it up in a million sub categories. I like to call my preferred category "whiny boys with guitars".

Good stuff I've been listening to lately (not all is indie)

Ugly Casanova - I love me some Modest Mouse and some Isaac Brock. As can be seen by the fact that my blog url comes from the song Heart Cooks Brain and my title quote comes from the song The View. (My last title came from a hauntingly beautiful Death Cab for Cutie song).

Brandston - Such an awesome band still touring in a beat up van.

Matt Costa - Can I marry him? He can be my 2nd husband. I love surfer boys.

John Mayer - Seriously the Continuum album rocked me like only a whiny boy with a guitar can rock me.

Keeping It Real

Things your Mom didn't tell you (but really should have):
* Your first love will most likely grow up to be a total loser. In high school he was probably the shit but as we all know that the requirements for being cool in grades 9-12 are not often the qualities that enable someone to make it in the real world. There are very few exceptions to the rule.
* Giving birth is nasty messy (think blood and poop TOGETHER). Not that I know this first hand but I've read enough blogs to know this is true.
* Breast feeding is really hard. Again not something I know first hand but I've watched enough TLC Baby Story to know this is true.
* Making dinner every night, night after night SUCKS. Luckily we have enough room in the budget for me to become a whiny baby every week (or more) but if not then I would be moaning all the time about cooking (and I like cooking).

Most importantly, the one thing your mom didn't tell you but probably should have: Marriage. Is. Hard.

Now I'm not saying that Dave and I are having issues. In fact we're just as happy as we've always been for the most part. As we all know every relationship has it's highs and lows. There is nothing to be ashamed of in that. Sometimes the highs (like in the beginning) are enough to keep a smile on your face all day and sometimes the lows are enough to make you lock the office door while you frantically call your best friends to dissect his a-hole tendencies. Other times the highs are great and the lows are sad but are less like mountains and more like rolling hills.

The hardest part of marriage (for me at least): THIS IS FOREVER. You know that annoying way he starts projects but doesn't finish them? FOREVER. How he can kinda be selfish in bed sometimes? FOREVER. How he conveniently sucks at doing the dishes? FOREVER. Yep, all minor things but mind-numbing when I'm experiencing them and thinking to myself "yay! only 40 more years of nagging him to re-attach the fire detector after taking it down to paint 6 MONTHS AGO".

Really I should be thankful. I've found someone who loves me just as much as I love him. Someone who is good with his money, honest, loving, hard working, successful, and rubs my back each night. Someone who is tall, blue-eyed, athletic, and and makes me laugh. Still for the rest of my life I will be turning on the AC behind his back and then turning it off as the house finally reaches a pleasant temp because his eyes are bulging out of his head at the anticipation of the e-bill being higher then $30. Oh joy.

In other news, I want this car. Way out of my price league but still a girl can dream.
Lexus SC 08 Hard Top Convertible